Play a Game of “Would You Rather” and We'll Guess Which Biblical Job Would Be Perfect for You

By: Zoe Samuel
Image: jhorrocks / E+ / Getty Images

About This Quiz

Career choices are some of the biggest life decisions we make. They determine how much money we make, how stressed out we are, how many children we can afford, and how much free time we have to pursue our other interests. These days, job seekers are spoiled for ways to find that perfect job. There are many websites that allow job seekers to post their resumes, portfolios, and references. There are simple job boards. There are headhunters who seek people with special qualifications for jobs that can take them anywhere in the world.

In biblical times, things were not so easy. Most people simply did what their parents did. Most career changes resulted from cataclysmic events like wars, famines, or natural disasters. Migration caused people to change careers sometimes, and factors like land ownership or professional skills really helped to determine one's career path.

We've figured out a way to make this much easier for you. So you can be best prepared for the possibility of having to find employment in biblical times, we will be your guidance counselor. Just answer some "would you rather" questions and we will tell you which biblical job is right for you!

You've got a choice: would you rather have a rash that bothers you but no one can see, or one that doesn't bother you, but looks awful?

Money makes the world go around. Would you rather have loads of money, but lots of expenses, or no expenses, but only a little money?

Time to get spiritual. Would you rather God be a totally real jerk, or imaginary, but nice?

Mount up! Would you rather have to drive cross-country all alone, or ride a bicycle the length of Interstate 95 with dozens of other cyclists?

Would you rather have a receding hairline but a really stylish haircut, or have a perfect head of hair but no style at all?

Shh! Would you rather have nightmares every night but wake up well-rested, or never have nightmares, but wake up tired?

Let's see how the other half lives. Would you rather become hugely successful but have to work really hard for decades to do it, or have it all handed to you and get no respect for even your legitimate achievements?

Cassandra, anyone? Would you rather know what the future holds but be unable to stop it, or not know, but have agency?

Bon appetite! Would you rather bite into an apple and find a worm, or bite into an apple and find half of a worm?

Order! Order! Would you rather be on trial for a small crime most people won't care about but could mean you get punished, or be a lawyer defending someone so hated that you will be hated?

Would you rather be all thumbs or have two left feet?

Ahhhhh ... Would you rather get a massage every day or have a personal chef who cooks your every meal to perfection?

Imagine your job could be done from anywhere. Would you rather live in a tax haven like Bermuda or a tax haven like Monaco?

You've got a chance to strike it rich! Would you rather make your money from diamonds, which can have sketchy origins, or oil, which is responsible for destroying our environment?

Let's get geopolitical. Would you rather live in a less powerful nation on its way up, or a more powerful nation on its way down?

Practically speaking, would you rather have a cutting edge brand new PC, or an old Mac?

Pack it up! Would you rather have enough airline miles to travel for free for the rest of your life or enough hotel points to stay anywhere for free for the rest of your life?

Show off a little. Would you rather be a piano virtuoso or a genius oil painter?

Time to consider your sense of identity. Would you rather have a name no one can pronounce, or a name no one can remember?

Consider the possibilities. Would you rather always be stylish but a little uncomfortable, or always over-prepared?

Would you rather only ever play card games like poker and blackjack, or only ever play video games like RDR2 or Devil May Cry?

Prideful? Would you rather write brilliant books not recognized until after you are gone, or bubblegum novels that sell millions of copies?

It's time for a party time question. Would you rather always be on time but have to leave early, or always be late and stay the whole party?

A point on perspective: Would you rather feel like a person out of their time, or like nothing ever changes?

It's time to make the doughnuts! Would you rather have a low paid job with great benefits or a high paid job with no benefits?

Would you rather have a regular taxi chauffeur you to work every day or have a really nice car you have to drive to work every day?

Here's a fine distinction: Would you rather have seasonal allergies or a get a cold for a couple weeks every season?

Would you rather have job security but question your job's morality, or have to hustle all the time but be fine about the result of your work?

Are you satisfied with your job? Would you rather have a job with a product you can touch, or a job with an invisible effect?

Would you rather have your dream job but loose your best friend, or have all the best friends in the world, but never have your dream job?

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